Crime Blotter

Fridays at school are my earliest mornings. I have anatomy lab at 7:30 a.m., so I'm on my way about 6:15. Nonetheless, it's pretty quiet on the PT Penthouse (that's the 7th floor of Kell, for those of you none-DPT people). Yesterday morning, I arrived exceptionally early and found myself in the lounge with the GSU paper. I was flipping through and happened upon the CrimeBlotter. It chronicled the incidents from the week of August 21st. Mind you, it's a whole page of various incidents for just ONE week. As I read, I discovered 2 recuring themes. People are stupid. And people are mean.

Here's a quick recount of this week's events/incidences/violations of moral standards:

2 cases of students noticing various items were missing from their wallets.

2 criminal trespassing charges (apparently you can't be in GSU buildings if you're not a student).

3 cases of students locking their bikes and returning to find them missing.

1 girl left her cell phone unattended for 2 hours and was surprised to find it missing when she returned.

1 girl dropped her Crackberry over a rail and it was gone when she went down to get it. I don't know how it survived the fall.

1 man arrested for sleeping in a car that wasn't his. He broke the window to get in.

1 girl reported that someone entered the bathroom and took a picture of her in the stall.

1 idiot left his backpack and books unattended in the library. They too disappeared while he was gone.

1 well-intending individual had his wallet snatched when he took it out to give money to a panhandler.

And the icing on the cake (I must quote this one)
A non-Georgia State individual was charged with Theft. The individual placed a laptop computer in his pants and left the University Bookstore. Officers apprehended the man after a brief foot chase ensued [because everyone knows you can't run very well with a computer in your pants].

For the sake of brevity, I left out the individuals impeding traffic, selling alcohol to minors, dealing drugs, possessing drugs, harrasing students, and vandalizing cars, which accounted for a total of 13 incidents. :-)

And that, my friends, is why you don't leave your stuff lying around, carry pink pepper spray, walk with friends, and don't buy drugs. Duh. Be smart. The end.